Stitches * *
Cert 18, 87 mins
Starring Geordie busker turned stand-up star Ross Noble as a revenge-seeking clown, this is one of those films that makes you cringe the minute you see plenty of young, innocent faces in the cast.
Just what do the parents of such fresh-faced child stars say if they want to see what is a fully-deserving, 18-rated grisly horror movie?
Still less one that makes you feel that Stiches could even be Keith Lemon in a clown’s outfit.
“Cash up front, no dough, no show,” is his children’s party mantra before they inadvertently kill him in the kitchen.
Often playing as bright and colourful as the clown’s outfit itself, Stitches is better as an idea than it is in execution.
It’s a breezily-made romp, and despite the horrors here, the mood is sometimes sitcom light.
Several collected ‘brains’ each resemble a handful of thin pork sausages while the ‘blood’ often more like a topping hijacked from a passing ice cream van.
Speaking of which, there’s a novel use for an ice cream scoop before our central character reveals: “This clown’s not funny, not any more” and delivers further anti-teenager lines like: “What are you screaming for chunky? You’ve clearly got the stomach for it”.
Despite Noble’s character turning from a children’s party performer to a revenge-seeking slayer of teenagers, Stitches won’t have you splitting your sides at Vue Star City / Coventry Showcase.
But if you already hate clowns, it could turn your face just as white.
Paranormal Activity 4 *
Cert 15, 88 mins
With two writers and two directors on board, this third sequel feels as fuzzy as eating fudge in a fog.
PA4 had the potential to develop the link between our love for new technology and unwanted horror that is either real or imagined.
But that is an opportunity lost here, sacrificed on the altar of trying to make us jump no matter what.
Orin Pelli’s original idea that we’ll keep wanting to pay good money to watch a digital clock ticking over has surely run its course now.
Who Do You Love? The Kig Adora Story * * *
Cert TBC, 42 mins
For a less than micro-budget movie made as a labour of love by someone who knew there was a good story to tell, Who Do You Love? is a remarkably good account of a glam rock sleaze band from Birmingham.
King Adora formed in 1998 and were on the front cover of Melody Maker two years later, only to disappear almost as quickly after falling foul of traditional rock and roll excesses.
Considering the period was before the rise in social media, city director Ben Lewis has unearthed a decent amount of archive footage which he’s interwoven with some fascinating talking heads shots.
There will be a DVD launch party from 8.30pm on Saturday at Muthers Studio, Digbeth, (kingadorawrapparty.eventbrite.co.uk) before the documentary is screened again at the Worcestershire Film Festival on Saturday, November 4.
