Franck Queudrue will have mixed feelings before, during and after Birmingham City's crucial relegation showdown with Fulham this weekend but not so mixed that he craves anything other than an away win.
The Frenchman, who made his first appearance for a month when he came off the bench in the 2-2 draw with Liverpool, is set to stay in the squad for this weekend's trip to Craven Cottage to face the side for whom he played last season.
In all Queudrue made 32 appearances for the Londoners and he still stays in touch with some of his former team-mates, including Carlos Bocanegra who scored the visitors' goal in the 1-1 draw at St Andrew's late last year.
That might change if the American international does the same thing again in two days time and Queudrue has vowed to lay aside all concerns he has for Fulham's status in an effort to insure Birmingham do not make an immediate return to the Championship.
They could do exactly that this weekend. If they lose and Bolton and Reading beat Sunderland and Tottenham Hotspur respectively both Birmingham and Fulham will be relegated. Queudrue wants to contemplate neither scenario.
"I enjoyed my time at Fulham," he said. "It's tricky to say which way it will go. I will be sad for my mates, obviously, But this is my job. I've got no friends when I step on the pitch. That's not a problem.
"It's going to be the side that keeps its nerve that succeeds. They have some good players, too, like Danny Murphy. He knows the importance of the big games. Hopefully, we will get a good result. Then we can take it to the Blackburn game."
Birmingham's first task is to overcome the disappointment at squandering a two-goal lead against Liverpool last time out. Queudrue believes his side played nervously and should have dealt more ruthlessly with Jermaine Pennant who was allowed to slalom through the Blues defence to set up the equalising goal.
"We are in a bad position," he admitted. "We don't need to be pretty, we need to get points. If we want to change anything, we need some points.
"It's up to us to do something. We showed a good reaction from the game against Villa that was a good start. We put the effort in. Everyone was pulling in the same direction. I would say it is a mental thing. Especially in the situation we are in. We have to do that again.
Alex McLeish, meanwhile, has defended his reasons for not picking Daniel De Ridder in response to the winger's suggestion earlier this week he may leave St Andrew's to seek first team football.
The Dutchman has not played since the FA Cup debacle at Huddersfield Town, though he would have been involved against Aston Villa had he not been suffering with a hamstring problem.
The manager revealed he considers Gary McSheffrey, Sebastian Larsson and Olivier Kapo to be ahead of the former Ajax and Celta Vigo man.
"I said to Danny a while back that I felt if we were more of a passing team, I may think about him more," McLeish said. "That may sound a little bit out of the box, but that's the truth. I don't think we're a slick passing team and Danny's used to playing in the Dutch and Spanish teams where he's seen a lot of the ball.
"We've put a lot of emphasis on our wide men in their work rate and getting back in and defending while equally trying to get into the opposition box. I'm not saying that Danny doesn't do that. I just think he's more suited to a team that maybe pings the ball about.
Meanwhile Kapo has reiterated his desire to see out his contract with the club even if they do go down. "I like the project that the gaffer had in mind," Kapo said.
"I signed for three years for Birmingham and I want to stay here. I think next year we could have a very good team. I like it here. My family like Birmingham. For me, in my head, I am staying here. After three years, if Birmingham want me for one or two more years, then yes, why not?"