A Frenchman broke down in tears as he told a court how he stabbed his mother-in-law to death at her Midland home after she told him he was not good enough for her daughter.
Cherif Doua held his head in his hands as he recounted how he "lost control" and grabbed a kitchen knife when Valerie Brocklesby said: "I don't want my daughter to live with a thug."
Mrs Brocklesby, aged 62, died after being stabbed repeatedly at her home in Hately Heath, West Bromwich, five years ago.
Doua (42) then left her daughter, Jayne, for dead when she discovered her mother lying in a pool of blood, after telling her: "I have killed your mother. I am going to kill you. I have to kill you."
Giving evidence at a court in Beauvais, about 60 miles north of Paris, the father-ofthree told how he went to Mrs Brocklesby's home in Essex Avenue just before 7am on January 24, 2000.
He surprised her in the kitchen after going in through the back door and asked to see Jayne, his estranged wife, but the pensioner blocked his way.
"She was quite distant with me. She told me I had no business at her house," he told the court. "When she said I wasn't good enough for Jayne and insulted me, the anger rose in me.
"I could see the hatred she had towards me. At that moment I couldn't control myself. I took a knife. I started to hit her. I hit her, I hit her."
Doua, who took several minutes to compose himself, then added: "I never wanted to harm Valerie or hurt Jayne. I didn't know why I did it. I can't explain it."
Doua "acknowledges the fact" of the murder and attempted murder but denies acting with premeditation.
His case is being heard in France because it was not possible under French law to extradite him to the UK.
The former car salesman was a suspect in the murder of his first mother-in-law in France in 1988 and had a conviction for fraud.
The court heard that in the weeks and months before the attack he was arrested and bailed in connection with a stolen car inquiry and stopped by UK customs with a knife, plastic pistol, CS gas and latex gloves in his car.
He said in evidence that he did not know why he had the knife in a bag but the gloves could have been used when carrying out car repairs or filling up with petrol.
The day before the fatal stabbing he admitted punching his former wife after they met at a restaurant and she talked about a close platonic male friend.
Doua had described himself to the jury as a "calm and reflective" character who rarely got angry but who insisted he acted on the spur of the moment when committing the stabbing.
His relationship with his mother-in-law had also deteriorated because he had pulled out of a deal to buy her hardware shop in West Bromwich and renovate a flat above it.
Describing how he attacked his former wife, now aged 32 and in court to hear his evidence, Doua said he hit Ms Brocklesby with a flower pot after she found her mother's body in a pool of blood.
He tried to gag her with his hand to stop her shouting before picking up a pair of scissors and stabbing her in the neck.
Believing she was dead, he kissed her and left.
The defendant was later said to have called police and his family admitting his actions but it was a month before he was arrested after escaping to France.
Recounting the attack, he told the court: "I was like a madman. I couldn't control myself. I was destroying myself, Jayne and Valerie."
Doua said he had considered suicide as his life had " collapsed", adding: "I couldn't live without her.
"When I killed Jayne's mother everything collapsed. I couldn't be apart from Jayne. At that moment I wanted to kill myself."
The trial continues.